Stop The World I want to get off

Hey there fellow bloggers in blog land.

I’m new. 

One of my resolutions was to start up a blog about my journey to have a baby and to hopefully share some of my journey with some of you that may be experiencing some of the same things.

 I’m a 34 (be 35 in March) year old female, married for 2 + years to TKS.  We’ve been trying to have a baby for about a year and a half….  Well, actually TKS would argue that.  We threw away the BC in Septemeber of 2006 and said, ok lets see what happens.  What he may not realize is that his extremely “perfectionist” wife was already counting days……  Oh I was pretty sure we would get pregnant on the first try. I knew EXACTLY when I was ovulating and made sure we had all of our days covered….month after month….AF showed up.  Every 26 days.  You can set a clock to my cycle.  Went for my annual at the GYN….. she was not worried, she said try for another 6 months and then come back.  We then tried 3 months of clomid.  nada. nothing. zilch. zero.   

I couldnt believe how obsessive I was becomming. 

 Went back to the DR.  I begged her to find out what was wrong…. she still didnt believe there was anything to worry about but sent me for an HSG anyway. 

 We are now fast forwarding to June of 2007.  Dr. did not prepare me for the pain during the HSG.  I almost fainted.  The nurse had to put on cold cloths on me.  The Dr. who gave me the test showed me the films, here is how the dialogue went

DOC: “you have a bicornuate uterus”……

ME: “WHAT?  I have a what uterus?” (still shaking from the pain)  

DOC: “a bicornuate uterus”,   “basicallly when you were in the womb the uterus didnt develop properly”

ME:  “ok, so what do I do”

DOC:  “you have to talk to your regular doctor, but most women can still have a baby, just high risk”

ME:  “ok”  (in my head- get me the f**k out of here)

I then run out into the waiting room, tks has no idea whats going on, I get in the passenger seat and I start hysterical crying and saying”just go, drive”  while tks is begging me to tell him whats wrong.

I finally get it all out and start searching on the internet.  You can only imagine what kind of crap I read.  I didnt stop crying for days.

Now I am really going to fast forward….. saw an RE.  Did an ultrasound and then MRI.  Found out I did NOT have a bicornuate uterus but a SEPTUM in my uterus, which means basically tissue that was dividing my uterus in half.  Had surgery in October 2007  (lap/hyst) to remove septum.  Prognosis was good.  Doc said he got it all and everything else looked great, no endo, clear tubes, ovaries look perfect.  Told us to TTC in 2 months.   

I am now in the 2ww.

I don’t think it will be this month.  I mean, we tried with an ovulation kit, but honestly we only maybe got it once at the right time.  I know it only takes one time, so of course I’m hoping….. but not holding my breath.

 Anyway, many of your blogs got me through some tough times…. I love love love reading about all of you and your journeys…. I hope you invite me in to join the fun.

thank you thank you

you can call me Sandy